Memory and Forgiveness
For some the new school house "is a symbol of hope." Mennonite, Rita Rhoads, said, "We want the kids to just quietly show up one day and go to school normally." All but one of the wounded girls have returned to classes: the one who hasn't is in a coma and is living and being cared for at her home. One wonders what "go to school normally" might mean to those who survived.
The response of the Mennonite community that suffered this trauma has been remarkable. I say "remarkable" in its living out the gospel, particularly the Sermon on the Mount. The community's reaching out to the family of the murderer has been especially poignant. Rita Rhoads told the author that while the families have been devastated, "there's no anger. There is a lot of 'why?' But life goes on. The healing continues. It's not to say they're not sad. They are sad. They are mourning, but they're doing well."
How does one heal after going through such terrible tragedy? I think about this and the Mennonite response especially in light of the book I am currently reading by Miroslav Volf, The End of Memory: Remembering Rightly in a Violent World. Volf writes,
as trauma literature consistently notes, the healing of wounded psyches involves not only remembering traumatic experiences; it must also include integrating the retrieved memories into a broader pattern of one's life story, either by making sense of the traumatic experiences or by tagging them as elements gone awry in one's life. Personal healing happens not so much by remembering traumatic events and their accompanying emotions as by interpreting memories and inscribing them into a larger pattern of meaning--stitching them into the patchwork quilt of one's identity, as it were...the memory of suffering is a prerequisite for personal healing but not a means of healing itself. The means of healing is the interpretive work a person does with memory. So salvation as personal healing must involve remembering, but mere remembering does not automatically ensure personal healing (pp. 27, 28).I am interested to learn what he says about how healing affects the remembering. It is precisely those memories that lodge in us like a stone in a shoe that seem to prevent the healing from occurring. Any thoughts about this process of forgiving, healing, remembering?
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